It seems like hunger strikes are all the rage these days in Canada. It started out with good old Chief Spence. She wanted a meeting with the Prime Minister, and went on a hunger strike to get it. Or so we all thought. Before you all cry foul, I know…I know. I fell for it too. I even blogged about her plight, thinking that she was slowly wasting away. Little did I know at the time she was on a liquid diet that included fish broth, liquified big macs and fryer grease from a local fast food joint. I think before it was all over she gained a couple of pounds.
Now there’s a fisherman in New Brunswick who’s on a hunger strike to protest changes to the Employment Insurance Act (EI). Except he’s not actually on a hunger strike, apparently he’s on a liquid diet as well. Which means he’s probably in it for the long haul, or at least until his claim runs out. No fear of him starving to death. That being said, he managed to get himself on the news if nothing else. I guess you don’t actually have to be on a hunger strike to be on a hunger strike.
So I’m starting one. I have a few issues I’d like someone to address, and if it means going on a hunger strike to get some results, so be it. Except, my issues aren’t quite as serious as the fisherman’s or Spence’s. So, I don’t really see a point in just living on liquids. I wonder if a rotating pastry strike will work. Or maybe a pizza and chicken wing slowdown. Then again, I might just picket Tim Horton’s and boycott carrots. As long as I get my 2 minutes on the news.
Wonder what I’m protesting? I’m going on a hunger strike to protest hunger strikes that aren’t actually hunger strikes. It’s becoming a serious problem. Next thing you know cops will be giving up donuts. The Irish might even quit drinking! And for what? Whatever irritates them I guess. So I’m starting the protest tomorrow morning. If I can run a t-bone steak and box of pop tarts through the blender. So if you see me on the news, you’ll know it worked. Ta ta for now….